I have been called “bossy” since I first started talking at eight months old. I have heard it from everyone, ranging from my brother to classmates I barely know. For most of my life, I have accepted this adjective with a sense of pride, but it was not until recently that I began to shy away from it.

For example, I have begun to speak up less in class and in group discussions. I am less likely to give my opinion if it is not directly asked for or if I am not comfortable with the people and my surroundings. I made the decision to let my voice be silenced for the fear that if I spoke up, I would be disliked.

Time Magazine staff writer Susie Poppick says in “Getting Mad at Work Can Cost Women $15,000 in Annual Pay” that a recent study reports that assertive women are rated 35 percent less competent than more subdued women. Is the work I do, and other women who speak their minds, truly worth 35 percent less?

Similarly, Catherine Pearson from Huffington Post writes in her article “This Is How We Talk About Female Leaders (Hint: It’s Not Pretty)” that women are twice more likely to be labeled as “pushy” than men.

Pushy is characteristic respected in male leaders. Pushy men get things done. A pushy man would be looked up to by both men and women, as it is not just men who are guilty of labeling assertive women with unfair adjectives. We are pushy because we have to fight for our voices to be heard in a crowd that doesn’t want to listen.

Whether we are fighting for rights to our own bodies or equal pay and treatment, the voices of women are silenced by the voices of uninformed and unimpacted. It is our right to be opinionated, to be bossy, to be pushy. We have to be for both ourselves and the future. If I am opinionated, it is because I am passionate. If I am bossy, it is because I am a boss. If I am pushy, it is because you haven’t listened yet.

So, maybe I should take some advice from my more confident, younger self, who would tell her brother that, sure, maybe she was bossy, but she also has the same right to have her voice heard as anyone else.

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