Instead of sitting in class last Thursday, March 31, a group of junior girls, including myself, attended sessions put on by the first inaugural Memphis Women’s Summit.

The summit consisted of inspiring female leaders in the Memphis community who have made it their goal to “elevate Memphis,” like the summit’s theme stated. Some leaders included Ms. Joan Lunden, former co-host of “Good Morning America,” Ms. Amy Weirich, General District Attorney of Shelby County, Ms. Amy Speropoulos, LocalMemphis News Anchor and Ms. Terri Lee Freeman, president of the National Civil Rights Museum.

With each session, I learned something new that I felt the need to share. These are some of my takeaways from the summit. 

1. “Memphis won’t change unless you do.”

The summit began with a speech by Ms. Vicki Clark, owner of Building the Capacity of Organizations. Ms. Clark reminded us that Memphis is made up of all of us. She said that we are Memphis, and “Memphis won’t change unless [we] do.” The people are what make Memphis the place that it is, so if we want to enact positive change in our community, it has to start with us. Ms. Clark said that we need to stop asking what Memphis is going to do about a problem and start asking what we are going to do about that problem.

2. “Are you ready?”

My first session of the day was about answering the call to civic and community leadership, led by Ms. Weirich. Ms. Weirich told us a story of when she was first promoted to the position of District Attorney. The moment before her big interview for the job, her boss simply asked her, “Are you ready?,” a question that has always stuck with her. Ms. Weirich reminded us that we will be given opportunities to lead in the future, and we must always be ready for these opportunities when they arrive.

3. Everybody has a story.

During her session, Ms. Weirich also told us stories from her job, stories of families, adults and children who she has interacted with over the years. One thing she reminded us about was that they try to steer away from asking what the person has done during court and instead ask what their story is. Everybody has reasons for their actions, and we may never understand some of them. However, it is our responsibility to look from the other person’s perspective and always try to show empathy.

4. Courage is doing something that is unpopular but you know is right.

My favorite session of the day came from Ms. Claudia Haltom, founder and CEO of the A Step Ahead foundation. Ms. Haltom was a Memphis juvenile court judge for 17 years. During her time as a judge, Ms. Haltom saw a direct correlation between poverty and unplanned pregnancies, so Ms. Haltom retired early from her comfortable position as judge to found the A Step Ahead foundation, an organization devoted to providing free long-acting reversible contraceptives. When Ms. Haltom told her family of her plans, they laughed at her and thought she was kidding, but Ms. Haltom knew this organization was needed in the community. Now, the unplanned pregnancy rate is down 45 percent in Shelby County, largely thanks to her organization.

5. “Face facts and hold onto hope that you’ll prevail.”

Ms. Gayle Rose, CEO of EVS Corporation, was one of the lunchtime speakers. She taught everyone a lesson learned from the Stockdale Paradox, named after Mr. James Stockdale, an American and United States navy vice admiral who was a prisoner of war for over seven years. When he was asked who suffered the most in captivity, he said it was the optimists because they kept thinking they’d get out by a certain date, and when they didn’t, they were heartbroken. The idea that you have to face the cold, hard facts of your reality, yet still hold onto the hope that you will prevail in the end, has become known as the Stockdale Paradox.

6. Don’t try to do it all yourself.

Another tip of advice shared by the lunchtime speakers was that the worst trait in a leader is trying to do it all. The speakers voiced that it is vital as a leader to have a strong team that has your back, and to allow them to help you. I am the kind of person who sometimes tries to do everything herself, but this reminded me just how important it is to share the workload with people I respect and trust.

7. Find a mentor.

The lunchtime speakers also said that mentors are an invaluable part of learning and growing. Find someone in your community who you respect, and allow them to help mold you. Everybody needs someone older to look up to, and it is never too early to start looking for that person.

8. Understand your values, and do not compromise them for anything.

In a session with Ms. Mary Kay Wegner, the SVP at Terminix, we received advice on effectively handling conflict and negotiations. She stressed the importance of knowing yourself and knowing what values you would never be willing to compromise. Some conflict can be healthy, especially when when the conflict stems from standing up for something you believe in. These conflicts teach you the valuable lesson that you should always stand by your values and defend them no matter what.

9. “Just take one more breath.”

Ms. Susannah Herring, owner of Hot Yoga Plus, gave a session on being your best self. In the session, we meditated and did yoga while Ms. Herring told us about lessons she has learned from meditation and yoga. One of those lessons was how you can sometimes avoid conflict or control your emotions by simply taking one more deep breath. If you feel overwhelmed or don’t think you can push yourself any further, just take a deep breath and keep moving forward.

10. Women are powerful.

One of the most important takeaways I took away from this summit was how strong women are. Women are too often degraded and treated unjustly, but being in a room with powerful, passionate women for the day reminded me that women are so much more than their stereotype. There are not many women on the top, but it can be done. Women can be good leaders just like men can.